BMG Connections Ltd - Daily Insight

Various Ways to Overcome Social Anxiety

10/3/2011 1:55:55 AM

There are many ways on how you can detect social anxiety disorder and various ways to overcome your situation. The most important thing that you should do is to ask for help from experts in this field. It can be difficult to a person who has social anxiety disorder to tell that he or she has social anxiety disorder - Since they are already preoccupied with a lot of thoughts and ill feelings that have been bothering them for a period of time, being objective and thinking of something logical can be difficult for them.

People who are suffering from social anxiety disorder can be very emotional because their minds can be clouded with a lot of fears and inhibitions. Seeing an expert in this field can help a lot for them to recover and get better, experts can prescribe drugs that can greatly help those who have social anxiety disorder.

If you have social anxiety disorder - The various ways to overcome your situation may be financially demanding. There are a lot of ways to live a healthier and happier life without spending a lot of money. Negativity is easily contagious rather than positivity - No matter how good your day is, something as trivial as reading the news can instantly make you feel bad. Unfortunately, this bad feeling will not only last for a couple of minutes or hours. This bad feeling can develop into deeper kinds of fear, sadness, self doubt and even anger.

Currently, one of the most effective cures for social anxiety disorder is hypnotherapy where the therapist can guide the subject through the problems and bring the subject to a successful conclusion by creating order in the brain.

A person who has social anxiety disorder cannot realize or even see the good things that are happening in his or her life because they are preoccupied with the ill feelings and thoughts that they have constantly bothered them for a long time. Another addition to overcome social anxiety disorder is to purposely and consciously surround yourself with happy and positive people.

Everybody deals with different kinds of problems every single day but happy and positive people can deal with their problems easily. They seem to have a care free life and they just continue living their lives to the fullest because they are not held back by their fears and inhibitions.

A lot of people suffer from social anxiety disorder and do not even know it. Learning more about this kind of condition that is very common in people can help you overcome it and live a better life for yourself and for the people that you love and would like to love.

If you would like to learn how to eliminate social anxiety with BMG Techniques and then rediscover and hone your communication skills with others then feel free to phone our friendly team for a FREE consultation on 020 7586 9350.

Warmest regards

Adam Cumberland

3 Steps to Approach Women

7/28/2011 2:19:52 AM

...taken seriously by a woman and finally we have Exhibit C the wealthy guy who on the surface appears to have everything but who still needs the help of a reality show akin to The Bachelor to capture a bride.

When reading this if you find you fall under any of the above categories your problem most certainly lies in your lack of self promotion to the opposite sex. Whether we are conscious or not of selling ourselves we are all marketing ourselves at certain specific times. Self presentation and demeanour are crucial when you make an approach.

When you fully understand Social Dynamics - then no woman will be beyond your reach.

Below are a 3 instant pointers on how to approach a woman.

1. Cultivate courage - Practice will make each approach easier as confidence is an emotional equation. To gain confidence you must first face fear by using courage. When you have conquered this you will never go back to your old habits. Courage + Fear = Confidnce.

2. Initiate a conversation as the first couple of minutes of an encounter will usually make or break it - remember the cliché that first impressions always last, therefore it is important to come across as genuine in your approach and not use lines. Pick up lines may work on an odd occasion but for the most part will fail. We do not teach lines or routines but teach a natural approach with techniques, principles and strategies that encompass your own individuality. Try Initiating a conversation by using an observation - understanding where a woman’s focus lies and starting at this point. Refrain from small talk as this will lead nowhere and the conversation will falter. If you were in a coffee shop and a women is looking at the menu - a reasonable observation could be along the lines of:

"Can you recommend a new coffee? - I feel like trying something new"

This makes for a friendly opening narrative that you know will be received well, plus she will observe your personality as you would have shared your thoughts with her. This is the core of our teaching - you must take the 'Lead' and share of yourself. This does not make you controlling but puts you in control which is a very attractive trait.

3. Simplicity is the key - Always be yourself and do not try projecting someone you are not as this will clearly hinder any long lasting relationship. In a subtle and honest manner convey the basics of who you are and you will find she will be more forthright in revealing more of herself. Remember to share first (Lead). Even if you feel nervous - state to the women you feel nervous which is counter intuitive to what most men would do but actually creates attraction as you are being true to your self. The fact you were nervous and 'manned up' and spoke anyway will make a lasting great impression.

Here at BMG we have precise steps from A to Z (The BMG Philosophy) from building unstoppable confidence in approaching new women to conversational skills with women right through to the dating process and relationship management. We have plenty of FREE information to share with you at www.BMGconnections.com as well as a FREE Newsletter or if you really want to kick start your interactions with women we have a Seminar coming up http://www.bmgconnections.com/Seminar-Men-Only where I will be sharing brand new content over 4 hours which will make for an eye opening experience.

Above all - Have fun and make women happy.

Adam Cumberland
BMG Connections Founder
www.BMGconnections.com

News Of The World - Phone Hacking Scandal. Is this you?

7/12/2011 4:00:00 AM

Ed Milliband who attacked David Cameron for employing Andy Coulson as Director of Communication and accusing David Cameron of cosying up and being close friends with Rebecca Brookes, Editor of the News of the World had good evidential facts to work with but even with all this ammunition he failed to come across as forthright and his demeanour failed to impress or be convincing and although he could have made a great impact his speech came across as weak and ineffective. He stood blankly looking into the camera with no passion or commitment. Whether he was right or wrong he did not get the message across. His body language was non existent and his speech had minimum impact. He had the facts and figures to hand but his lack of passion let him down.

David Cameron who is clearly in a very awkward situation by employing Andy Coulson as Director of Communication and giving him a second chance and being a close friend of Rebecca Brookes had his work cut out to calm the volatile situation and generally speaking Cameron is an excellent communicator and comes across as compelling and convincing. Unfortunately on this occasion he stumbled on the word 'resignation' and this small slip crucified him. The press now wants to know why he stumbled on this particular word and whether there were esoteric reasons for this stumble. On this occasion he lacked commitment and came across as evasive. Words are of vital importance and the way we use them is paramount to being a successful communicator.

When you observe the rhetoric from James Murdock (Junior), obviously an intelligent man but he came across as dead pan and it appeared that he could have burnt the night oil by staying up to the early hours learning a script, nothing genuine came across, was guarded in his response to pertinent questions and failed to impress or convince anyone of his innocence in this situation. Whether he was genuine or not a negative opinion will be formed by the majority who viewed his speech.

Rupert Murdoch Senior on the other hand, an elderly gentleman of the world made jokes and tried to diffuse the situation, a difficult and complex man to read but puts across to the general public what he wants them to believe. A master at his craft. This man obviously over the years has learnt the art of body language, eye contact and choosing specific words that impact to his full advantage.

Finally, let us address the lady Rebecca Brookes, a close friend and neighbour of David Cameron. She claims she had no knowledge of what was going on and away from her office at the time the offences allegedly took place. Although this is somewhat hard to believe she clearly has not helped her situation by hiding away from the press. If she had made a convincing appearance to the world at large she could have improved her chances of being believed by being forthright and assertive in her views of the situation with regard to the allegations against her and she may not have been judged as harshly as she has, by her non appearance it clearly makes her look guilty of misconduct.

BMG Connections are consistently meeting people from all walks of life and in a multitude of situations who fail to connect with others in a positive way and however hard they try are unable to transmit effectively their point of view or exhibit their feelings. The News of the World phone hacking incident is a scenario where it is paramount that each person can speak and express themselves with clarity. If this does not happen there will be serious consequences. We at BMG Connections help individuals express themselves in a positive and clear manner whether it be in a situation akin to the News of the World scandal or in everyday situations whereby you meet individuals that you need to impress or make an emotional connection with.

Communication in the 21st Century is more vital than ever before. You may be highly skilled in your chosen subject or profession but if you cannot convey these skills and convey your thoughts and ideas with 100% clarity you will always fail to achieve your best. To connect emotionally and with complete clarity and confidence will bring not only financial success but also success in every area of life.

BMG tutor in effective communication skills through proven BMG Techniques and practices and whether you need to learn the art of being media savvy and being aware of the pitfalls, hosting a special event where your actions are scrutinized at every second or need to become an effective communicator in order to start and sustain an intimate relationship we are here to assist. This is our forte and we can guide you through the minefields of disasters and improve your communications skills from A to Z to a parallel beyond belief.

To take that first step please go to www.BMGconnections.com or telephone BMG Connections where one of our helpful consultants will happily share further information. We look forward to hearing from you.

Adam Cumberland
BMG Connections Founder
www.BMGconnections.com
TEL: 020 7684 3431

How to take Questions from the Audience

6/1/2011 4:00:00 AM

Thus, a good public speaker must learn how to handle such questions and how to give the proper and effective response. Being caught off guard might be detrimental for a public speaker. Giving the improper response or responding in an inappropriate manner might give a negative impression.

As mentioned, responding to a question involves two aspects - the actual answer and the manner by which such answer is given. Both aspects should work hand in hand in ensuring the most positive and beneficial effect on the audience. The bottom line is that the speaker should always make sure he or she is in control of the situation - or at least appears to be. This is important or else the credibility or influence of the public speaker is diminished or lost.

There are simple tips that public speakers can practice in order to prepare them on the matter of how to take questions from the audience. First of all, anticipate possible queries in advance. If the subject matter being talked about is highly controversial or sensitive, think of possible disarming questions that may be raised during the discussion. The speaker can thus prepare well in advance the appropriate answer in consultation with his team, his handlers, or his advisers. This is especially applicable for politicians and other public figures.

During the question-and-answer portion itself, a public speaker should remain calm and collected. If a controversial or touchy question is asked, do not express a negative or defensive reaction, such as displeasing facial expressions or body language. Allow the question to be aired, and then properly acknowledge or thank the person who asked it. If the question calls for a simple factual answer that the speaker does not know of, it is always best to answer honestly. People most often know whether a person is lying or not, so it is best to establish credibility by being humble as well.

If the question seeks an opinion on an issue and the speaker would rather not give any, he would best be honest about it as well. He or she can politely decline to comment, or can simply state that he or she would rather not say anything about it at that point in time.

Always remember to be pleasant, courteous, and understanding. Ask to repeat a question if it sounds unclear. Learning how to take questions from the audience can also be made easier with the right coaching and guidance from consultants and public speaking professionals.

If you would like to see a live demonstration and learn by giving live presentations yourself on how to create compelling, engaging and influential presentations - Please contact our friendly team who are waiting to assist you.

Adam Cumberland
Founder - BMG Connections
Our Team Tel: 020 7684 3431

Men are craving freedom - How to give this so he always craves you!

5/7/2011 4:00:00 AM

To stand back and allow space and accept this as a male trait without feeling rejected will surely bring rewards in the long term as your man will appreciate the much needed time and space. To understand this concept - is to understand your man. A man wants to feel freedom even though he is in a relationship. Most men will spend less time examining the intricate details of a relationship than a woman. A man is just as anxious as a woman to have a caring and meaningful partner to share his life and experiences with. A man will only share his feelings if he is in a ‘good place’ and feel secure in the relationship. His actions will not always demonstrate his true feelings towards his partner and can appear distant or withdrawn but rather than perceive his actions as a personal attack allow him the space he truly needs and you will invariably discover that his attraction and attention towards you will increase within often minutes as you would have fulfilled a vital need in your man to feel freedom. This will inspire in him a desire to want to stay with you and enjoy you at an even higher level and will seek new ways in which to please you.

Jenny’s Story.

A female client of mine, Jenny, who I have known for many years and who is married to a successful business man was going through a very traumatic time emotionally with her man. They were both intelligent and articulate individuals but their lives were over shadowed by their every day work problems. The gentleman in question was instrumental in organising high profile events akin to the famous Dubai Races and Jenny, a photographer whose portfolio included high profile weddings publicised in the prominent magazines of ‘Ok Magazine’ and ‘Hello Magazine’, but with all this status and financial stability the partnership was not thriving in a healthy and meaningful way.

I spent a few enlightening sessions with Jenny on our BMG ‘One to One Training Programme’ and was able to understand the slow and continuous breakdown in the communication between her and her good man.

There is a common misconception in most relationship problems - Most people think their problems are complicated but rarely is this the case. In fact I havn’t came across a complicated situation yet in any relationships and I’ve been working in this area for over 6 years. Just like a good mechanic fixing my car. I could spend weeks tinkering around the engine trying to work out the problem where a great mechanic can easily see the problem and tighten just the right bolt to solve the problem. I guess that makes me a relationship mechanic.

Back to Jenny and her man. I discovered that whenever her man came home, Jenny was quickly trying to pin him down in conversation and with numerous demands and requests as they had such busy lives. She felt their time was precious and that is why she was always quick to try and get things done. Her man had progressively became withdrawn and all attraction seemed to have gone.

The 21 day challenge.

After explaining the above concept of allowing your man freedom, I told her the next time he arrives home to greet him with a loving hug and allow him space for one hour to do his own thing. I suggested she do this every night for the next 21 days. She telephoned me after 9 days and stated that her man had clearly been enjoying the space and has since become more loving and affectionate. I ask her to continue for at least the 21 days and then you can decide for yourself if you wish to continue. Jenny contacted me six weeks later stating that she still gives him space and that he reciprocates this good feeling in other ways...“He now makes me dinner and helps out around the house” Jenny also stated “He looks at me as he did when we first got together which is an even bigger bonus, I feel we are more than back on track and it feels like it did when we first met”

Often effective communication is not what we actually say but often in what we don’t say. To understand how to meet men, attract men, interact with men or maintain a relationship with your man through effective communication, please drop me an email at info@BMGconnections.com or feel free to pickup the phone and I would love to hear your story.

Jenny has not just leant conversational skills and techniques to keep a man but has really discovered how human beings are wired up so she can communicate effectively to create any relationships she now wants.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Warmest regards.

Emma Watson
BMG Communication Consultant
BMG Connections Limited

Meeting Your Needs with a Man - Without being 'Needy'

4/28/2011 4:00:00 AM

1. When you experience an intense feeling allow yourself a few seconds before you say anything - absorb the feeling and try to understand this unique experience in this most powerful of moments as this knowledge is paramount in the way you communicate this awareness to others or that special person in your life.

2. When you experience a strong feeling - be aware before you share as you should observe whether this is a ‘cry for help’ or a ‘specific request’. A specific request to share with a new man is completely acceptable but a ‘cry for help’ will appear needy with disastrous consequences.

3. When embarking on a new relationship with a man do not seek approval but demonstrate you have something to give to the relationship and genuinely try to connect. The difference between the two behaviours is vast and will have completely different outcomes. Seeking approval of your man is one of fastest ways to lose him. He will feel choked and tied down when he ultimately wants to feel freedom...within the relationship.

4. If you feel you need reassurance be direct and ask for it. This is counter intuitive to what many women think - Do not plead for reassurance in a round about way as this will show a sign as coming across as needy. Ask and you shall receive.

5. If you want to share a concern with your man. A great idea is to schedule an appointment to talk. This will not appear demanding and if anything will create intrigue in his mind as he does not yet know what the communication will be about. You will not appear needy by making an appointment and it will be interpreted as you being forthright and knowing what you want in life whilst displaying that you are comfortable in your own skin. This will transcend in his mind into having respect for you as you are now no doubt beginning to set your boundaries.

I will do another blog on boundaries shortly. Essential for sparking attraction levels in his eyes for you.

6. When you communicate with a man refrain from blaming or being critical in your approach to a problem. “I hate it when you do....” “I wish you could stop....” “please dont....” - These are all bad ideas. If I was to say to you “Don’t think of a pink elephant” one would of course jump on the screen of your mind and you would just have more pink elephants. It is far better to address the situation with sentences commencing “I like it when you do…..” or “ You know when you done....it made me feel great” or “When you said....it made me feel lovely” This is a far healthier dialogue and will resolve a problem or difficult situation and give you more of the behaviour you like. Your man wants to please you.

7. When you have made a request and you achieve the desired result do not constantly keep expanding and repeating the request in different ways as your man will become confused and lose track of your point resulting in your request being ignored. Make your point and thank him for listening. State that the point is concluded, then feel free to talk further.

I have known several great women who have ended relationships before they have had a chance to develop.

I had a woman, Carol, in her late thirties attend our 2 day BMG Live Weekend Training Programme as she was constantly embarking on new relationships and ending them within the first few meetings. Carol was an interior designer for The Sanderson Hotel in London with involvement in many great hotels including The Fours Seasons and The Hudson in New York.

She had high self esteem in her work place and was financially more than stable but when she embarked on new relationships on a more personal level she became insecure and unsure. The business woman within was forthright and demonstrative but as soon as matters became intimate she shrank into a state of insecurity.

Here at BMG Connections we worked with her for a weekend and she began to realise the pitfalls of her behaviour patterns and together we organised specific strategies and techniques that she could put into practice to overcome this behaviour that had paralyzed her for so long.

At mid afternoon on the first day of working with Carol, something rather interesting happened. Adam our Founder and one of the other attendees were talking through some of the lessons and then all of a sudden Carol broke down in tears. Two of the other consultants and two other female attendees attended to her side to support her. Carol, then looked up with tears but then started laughing. Carol then explained to the group where she had been going wrong in her relationships. During these past relationships she always blamed the men for the demise of the relationships but she now realised that the problem actually lied with her. The reason she started to laugh was because she stated that she felt sorry for the men she had dated...which made the rest of us laugh out loud together.

Carol appeared the strongest women in the group and a role model to most women. She had achieved much in her life other than the one thing that she actually wanted. By the end of the second day of working with Carol she became not only clear in the mistakes she had made but she now knew how to move forward with absolute clarity.

Carol is now living in New York with her partner James who is an architect. Carol is very grateful to us and supports us by attending our seminars in New York and Los Angeles. Carol, you are always welcome here in London.

To find out how you could improve your communication skills with men, send me an email at eva.yarbug@BMGconnections.com We not only teach and demonstrate in the communication between you and men but we actually put these skills into action with live training. Lots of fun. How to meet great men to understanding men to interacting with men to maintaining a relationship is what I love to do.

I look forward to hearing from you and helping you on your exciting journey.

Eva Yarbug - Senior BMG Consultant

The Misconception of Good Looking People

4/19/2011 4:00:00 AM

Many such good men judge themselves harshly by a yardstick that is totally unrealistic and created by our 'twenty first century' shallow environment and which is of course a great pity as these good gentlemen allow themselves to be categorised into 'boxes' whereby they believe that men with these obvious physical attributes will ultimately get the attractive women. This misleading attitude will ultimately result in many a good men experiencing 'approach anxiety' which will bring to the surface feelings of cynicism and can often develop into low self esteem.

The truth is that visually attractive men inevitably struggle more to gain a woman’s respect and confidence. Many of my girlfriends and indeed myself have on many occasions been approached by visually attractive men and although complimentary and self indulgent to our ego most women would agree the defences will instantly go up. Questions will form in a women's mind as to whether this good looking individual is indeed just trying to 'pickup women' or 'spinning a line' and a womens instant reaction would be one of caution and to hold back, questioning the real concept of whether this man is actually interested in me as an interesting individual or is merely focussing on my physical attributes.

I met Neil (and with Neils permission to write this) to discover a rather average looking 35 year old man who had a great personality yet few got to enjoy it every day. After guiding Neil through numerous conversational skills and advanced BMG Techniques we decided to engage with some lovely looking women in a Mayfair Hotel lobby bar.

Although we could have changed Neils belief about women just wanting men with good looks in a 30 minute one on one induction - I decided to ask Neil to approach these women and to pretend that he was good looking just to see what would happen. Neil agreed. He walked in calm and controlled and started a conversation with two women using our conversational skills. After 5 minutes of chatting, the women were clearly enjoying his conversation. After a few more minutes Neil decided to depart from the conversation and came up to me with the biggest smile on his face. He realised that the women didn't really care about his looks and instead responded to his attractive qualities that were not on the surface.

Although he had a great interaction with these two women, he still had the belief engrained into him about women only wanting visually good looking men. Unless we take you through a concentrated eyes closed process the best way to change a belief is to create new reference points that state the opposite. With this in mind for the next 8 hours Neil approached and had positive interactions with another 15 women. This repitition in such a small time frame turned Neils belief from 'Women only want great looking guys' to 'all women are friendly and easy to talk'. I said to Neil "Do you still have to pretend to be attractive" to which he replied "No, I am attractive"

Like Neil many ordinary looking men well into their thirties and forties and although not outwardly attractive are pure magnets to many attractive women through sheer charisma and a personality displaying a sense of being at ease with themselves which is totally empowering.

When a women is approached by an average or even less attractive man with the right attitude and demeanor this man can instantly become the most attractive man in the room. I would suggest reading that last sentence again. Physical attributes are of course lovely but believe me they can become transparent and wear thin extremely fast. Beauty and charisma come from within and can shine immediately and will prove the test of time.

To transform your ability at meeting women in any situation, discover exact steps for moving an interaction forward, click on ‘Events’ tab above and come listen (with a free voucher) to us talk for 4 hours or go to ‘BMG Programmes’ above and take a couple of minutes to listen to the video about ‘The DNA of Communication Programme’ where you will transform your ability with women on our 2 day 'Live Interaction' Training Programme.

Eva Yarbug
Senior Consultant
BMG Connections Limited

How to turn 'Strangers' into 'Relationships'

4/12/2011 4:00:00 AM

became apparent on one of my recent DNA of Communication Programmes where one of my client’s, who I will refer to as Ben for the sake of privacy, who was a captivating and interesting individual but who was engulfed with self doubt and anguish of ‘what might happen’ if he approached strangers. Many call this approach anxiety where they can find life debilitating and restricting and unable to move forward with new relationships, friends and acquaintances.

Both Ben and I were standing in Harrods in London’s, Knightsbridge and Ben saw someone he wanted to talk to. Ben said to me “I am a complete stranger, why on earth would they want to speak with me?”. I agreed with Ben that people don’t like talking with complete strangers and that’s why we need to present ourselves in a fashion that eliminates anyone thinking of you as a stranger. Ben looked confused. I asked Ben to approach this person and to share of himself FIRST in conversation for a few seconds, so the person would get a sense of his personality. When we engage with others, it takes no more than 5 seconds for others to form a strong opinion of you. I took Ben through some BMG Techniques which addressed his confidence to approach. He approached and shared of himself using our conversational skills. The person he approached was clearly taken back by Ben’s bold approach but within seconds was also at ease with the interaction. They continued talking for about 15 minutes. Ben realised they actually had much in common and decided to exchange information.

When we meet strangers or individuals who are vastly different from the way we are, whether it be culturally, attitude on life, outward appearance or social status, on many occasions most individuals clearly and instantly ‘retreat’ from making an approach as it feels ‘different’ from their ‘norm’ and it is clear from their quite often unconscious behaviour that they unfortunately experience an element of ‘fear of the unknown’ whereas if they pursued this course and approached a stranger and embraced the situation as a ‘journey of discovery’ opportunities and lasting friendships are inevitable. Different is good - Expand your mind by approaching others and enjoy the ride of exploration with an open heart and learn from a complete ‘stranger’ a new perspective on life to enrich and broaden your own outlook on the world. Many of us tend to stay in our boxes and never look beyond. If we embrace everyone the world truly becomes your playground.

Did Ben get lucky by exchanging numbers because he had something in common with that other person? No. When we cultivate great communication skills you will find that you have something in common with almost anyone. It comes down to knowing the right communication at the right time.

Yesterday, I was at The Grove in Hertfordshire, a beautiful manor house where Golf at The Grove is considered one of the finest courses in the UK. Whilst I was enjoying a coffee with the views of the marvelous grounds to my left whilst my attention was drawn back to the Malaysian Grand Prix quietly playing on the screen to my right, I noticed a gentleman sitting in the corner, keeping himself to himself and appeared scruffy in appearance with old clothes and poor grooming. Two of the people I was chatting with told me to steer clear of this person to which I replied “Why?” to be answered with “Well...just look at him.”

Why judge an individual on their outward appearance or demeanor, this is surely shallow and actually holds us back from our true potential and can only create missed opportunities.

The unknown to me is now fascinating and much more interesting than consistently interacting and communicating with others that appear similar to me. I approached this man with my only intention to have a positive interaction - he looked instantly surprised and seemed to withdraw for a moment, as he was clearly taken back by my approach. He was quite abrupt at first but after a few minutes of soft friendly banter he opened up and the barriers went down - I subsequently learned that Andrew was a successful architect with his own business with 600 employees. He was soon to be married and this was his stag party. His friends had changed his clothes and messed his hair and ensured he had no way of obtaining fresh clothes. Within 10 minutes he introduced me to one of his friends stating “meet my new found good friend, Adam”. I continued talking with him and his other friends for a further 20 minutes. This guy was interesting and extremely intelligent and very wise in the ways of the world. He was not superficial. This was an intelligent, articulate man whose journey through life was filled with adventures and experiences that were totally fascinating. We both enjoyed the conversation and Andrew insisted I give him my business card. I look forward to meeting my new friend again soon.

To develop a mindset whereupon you look upon strangers as ‘potential friends’ is much healthier than constantly feeling you might suffer at the hands of the so called ‘different’ or ‘unknown’, misunderstandings, overreactions and bad assumptions always culminate in this thinking. When at the very core of most individuals, lies goodness and the need to be understood and if you approach the unknown and interact with others with this new attitude firmly set in your mindset you will surely bring out the best in others whilst enriching your own life with depth, wisdom and new found relationships in all areas of life.

Face the unknown. Embrace the unknown. Do the thing that feels unsure. Approach that person and you will be surprised at the positive reactions and the opportunities these new people will bring forth to your life.

To learn exactly how to meet women, men, business contacts or build a particular network around you, email our team so we can workout the best programme for you or come join us on our 2 day DNA of Communication Programme weekend where you and just 7 others not only discover new conversational skills but you will utilise these skills in live interactions whilst on the programme where you will attract anyone into your life. I will personally make numerous demonstrations on how to approach any person in any situation and create a connection using these techniques and then...

So will you.

Making you more of you.

Adam Cumberland

Chief Executive Officer

BMG Connections Limited

Being Friendly to working with Bentley

3/19/2011 5:00:00 AM

in many a good people. It was clear to see that at the core of some of their thinking was - “what can I get out of it”. We all know that networking is good for business and making contacts but if you let this come about naturally instead of consistently looking for an opening where you can “pounce” to gain that extra business contract - the world would truly be your oyster.

When a man or woman ruthlessly tries to network to make gains for their own cause - the outcome can be detrimental. It may initially open a few doors and you may feel you have made progress but ultimately the door will be slammed in your face. It would be naïve to suggest that we should not seek openings and opportunities in order to progress our lives, both emotionally and financially but if you consciously leave these thoughts on the back burner and focus your thoughts on what you could “unconditionally” do for someone without seeking “pay back” your efforts will be repaid ten fold in every area of your life which will create a Karma and contentment beyond words. If you try too hard and push too hard for purely business gains or emotional satisfaction you WILL fail every time. Give of yourself FIRST - do not seek rewards and they will come naturally.

Changing Your Mindset

When you earnestly seek to make a person happy without looking for a reward they will reciprocate to your needs.

As I was standing next to the stunning £1.5 Million Pagani Zonda F Roadster I saw a gentleman I thought would be nice to talk with. I approached him with a demeanour that was both helpful and caring and he automatically responded in a positive way and told me how he works for the car maker Bentley. The conversation continued and it was clear to see that we were both enjoying the conversation.

If you push for what you believe you can get from someone the results will be negative. However much money we each have the one thing we have in common is “we all want to feel happy and content”. You cannot buy this - it is not a commodity that you can automatically own. It is a feeling - and good feelings are brought about by people. People can make people happy or sad and it is your choice. If you instil this into your inner being and begin to enjoy speaking with people for being with people whether in business or socially, the rewards will come. You will ultimately find that you have secured that special contract or secured a certain telephone number from the opposite sex and all this would have been achieved without any effort - You purely attempted to enjoy their company by making them feel good and let nature take its course.

If you believe when speaking with individuals that everybody is “after something” this is a negative thought and absolutely no help to you. It may be true at some level and with certain individuals, but believing this in everyone is maybe not the best approach. Two wrongs do not make a right - so when speaking with people try to adopt an attitude of “trying to make them feel good” rather than looking for what you can get back.

DO NOT have a hidden agenda when speaking with people. Give them value by making them feel good FIRST. This can sound sanctimonious and staged managed but believe me this is not about “getting back” but this will, without a doubt materialise as a by product of your actions and this will enrich your life on an everyday basis. Stresses will subside as opportunities open up and you will inevitably become a happier and richer person in more ways than one.

We are now in talks with Bentley so BMG Connections can improve the communication skills of its sales and back office staff. This is great news for BMG but more importantly I want you to be aware that this was not my primary agenda.

It's the same when approaching an attractive women. Many men have told me how they want to pick up women with the focus being how to get her number. This is a mistake. When we focus on the person rather than the outcome, outcome takes care of itself. With the several politicians we have worked with to come across 'less political' - the same rules apply. Nearly all the money in the world is spent on buying a 'feeling' - to feel better than we did before. When you can make others feel good without them having to pay they will reciprocate in any way they can, whether that be business contracts, new contacts, a date with the opposite sex or a relationship.

The Seven Day Challenge

Try to effectively make others feel good every day for the next seven days whilst genuinely expecting nothing in return. This is not as easy as it sounds as most of us have been programmed to expect something in return. You WILL get better at it - at first there will be that little voice at the back of your head thinking, if I am kind and caring what will I get back, but this thought will actually negate all progress. KEEP TRYING and after a few days it will be automatic and you will begin to enjoy this new found attitude towards people. If you make it a way of life - which it will become if you constantly work at it, you will find your life will be so much easier and less stressful. The good vibes will connect with whoever you are speaking with and the rewards will be enormous and heart warming.

Get back to us in Seven Days with your thoughts.

When you are ready to make the decision in demanding a higher standard of excellence for yourself - join us in taking your everyday communication skills beyond what most would consider possible. Attend our taster Events and programmes where our BMG Trainers not only train and guide through conversational techniques, principles and strategies but also demonstrate in real live interactions which is truly amazing to watch.

Enjoy people, create powerful relationships and love life.

Adam Cumberland
Chief Executive
BMG Connections Limited

Dubai Seminar - Approaching women will never be the same

2/15/2011 5:00:00 AM

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